(Them) “You know you’re a control freak, right?!”
(Me) “Yes, and the problem is…?”
Hearing I was a control freak used to make me feel flawed or defective in some way.
Like if I was only a better person, I somehow would stop worrying about…(insert topic of choice here).
I heard it as a criticism, and it hurt because it felt like a negative evaluation of who I am as a person.
Like being criticized for having blue eyes or for being a certain height.
But I believe my self-growth is core to where my success comes from…
And I’m committed to alleviating feeling shame from all aspects of my life…
So there came a moment where I decided to explore being a control freak and see if I could create a ‘pivot’, which turned out to be a gift for me AND for my coaching business.
Here’s a breakdown of what I did:
#1. I got crystal clear about what the values were (for me) about being a control freak.
For example, on the positive side I realized I was attaching the values of caring, excellence, and highest quality to trying to control everything.
The benefits? My clients feel honored and respected, and my courses and certification trainings have a reputation for delivering outstanding content and high value.
But the shadow side of these values revealed I was overly worried about what others would say or think of me, and of course, perfectionism.
#2. I looked around and saw that every hugely successful entrepreneur I know of is often super controlling.
I thought about this and rather than just using it as an easy-out permission slip to defend myself, I took a closer look at what I was choosing to control.
What if I stopped trying to control things that were actually causing me to play small?
What if instead, I consciously chose to control key areas in my business that would make a measurable difference and create expansion?
That was the perfect pivot to focus on!
The first key area I started to focus on was tracking my numbers.
Because without exception, what you track expands.
And when it comes to numbers, ignorance is definitely anything but bliss.
Here’s a quick list of the key numbers I track:
Daily money coming in.
Waiting until you ‘have something to track’ doesn’t work. The point is to track your revenue no matter what (even the zero dollar days). Then use the numbers as a catalyst to spark making new choices in who the clients that you best serve are, what your offers are, and how you create revenue in your business.
Monthly expenses
I track mine using about a dozen simple categories. More importantly, I stopped looking just at the total, and instead started looking at the specific categories and questioning the value and ROI (return on investment) each expense was contributing to the overall profitability of my business. The result was being quicker to let go of services that weren’t adding enough value, and to feel confident when choosing to add in new services that would help us grow.
List size growth
To be fully transparent, I ignored this for years. But now that I’ve been tracking it, it’s been the catalyst for making important and exciting changes that support getting my message of empowering women with money out into the world in a bigger way. Vision being served? Check!
Discovery Sessions
This may be THE single most impactful number I’ve been tracking all year! Simply by tracking the number of conversations we hold and the number of clients who say yes to our certification trainings, everything in my business has up-leveled. For example: I changed our pricing methodology (which our incoming clients love). I made certain that our core values of integrity, dignity, respect, and caring shine through in every discovery session conversation. We implemented a client on-boarding orientation that our certification training students rave about, and much more. Most importantly, I have confidence that this part of my business runs smoothly, and I hear every week from our certification clients how much they love the experience they have coming into their certification training.
So where am I now in my journey of being a control freak?
Oddly enough, since making these changes I can’t remember when the last time was that someone called me that.
And if they did, I now wouldn’t take it as a criticism, but instead would see it as an opportunity to self-coach on where I may be worrying too much about what others think…
and look instead at where I can make sure that my values are being fully expressed in my business.
That’s the moment when there’s no ‘freaking’ that needs to happen, because the path of being an entrepreneur is all about expansion and evolution into being our highest and greatest self.
